Shiva

BY : Nemain
Category: X-Men - Animated Series (all) > General
Dragon prints: 5097
Disclaimer: I do not own X-Men Evolution, or any of the characters from it. I make no money from from the writing of this story.

Bruce Spies
Normal
Bruce Spies
28
94
2002-09-05T10:55:00Z
2002-09-06T15:12:00Z
4
2568
14640
Spies and Associates
122
29
17978
9.4402





SHIVA—CHAPTER TWELVE (NC-17)

Standard disclaimers apply

 

 

A/N Thanks Foxfeather!
Thanks to everyone who reviewed….enough to make a girl get all light in
the head… ;) On a side note but related, going on a mini-vacation so between
Sept. 6 and late Sept 8, I won’t update, I’ll be harassing the nice ladies at
the Alamo, trying to peer closer at Davy Crocket’s hat or some such… However, when I come back I’ll have all this
pent up need to write fanfic so updates will be flying! (er, sorry, Foxfeather—gonna get slammed
w/email again!)

 

 

 

 

“How long
has be been like this?’

“Pretty
much all day… Yo, Kurt!” Evan snapped
his fingers in front of Kurt’s face to no avail. “Sorry, Rogue…No go.”

Rogue
snorted and shoved Kurt hard.
“Kurt! Snap out of it!”

“Was?
Oh…sorry. Were you saying
something?” Kurt blinked twice then
settled again into a slouch, staring at the empty lunch tray before him.

Evan and
Rogue exchanged looks and sat on either side of their friend. “Look, man,” Evan began, then paused, not
sure what to say. “You need to buck up.
She’s just at home!”

“Yeah, I
mean, it’s cute that you’re all I-Miss-My-Girlfriend and all, but sheesh! She’s not dead or nothin’.”

Kurt heaved
a deep sigh and tilted his head to look at Rogue. “Ja, I do miss Kitty but that’s not the only thing wrong…I’ve just
got a lot to worry about.” The secret
he was keeping from Kitty preyed on his mind, turning his insides into
knots. He had nearly left his lunch
unfinished, so upset was his stomach.
Picking at the remains of his fourth slice of pizza, Kurt shook himself
into a semblance of normalcy. If
Rogue and Evan are going to pick on me until I cheer up, may as well get it
over with.

“Is it your
English test tomorrow? That subjects killer
even for native speakers!” Evan volunteered.

“Er…yeah! That’s exactly it. English test…English test and Kitty.” Kurt plastered a relieved smile on his face and shoved the pizza
crust into his mouth, avoiding answering any more questions.

“If you
actually studied, you wouldn’t worry so much about the damned test!” Rogue was off and running. The two sniped at each other, not even
noticing when Kurt slipped away from the table and dumped his trash in the bin,
heading towards the solitude of the library.


“Hey…Kurt!” The whisper came from behind the recycling
bin. Kurt paused, one foot lifted in
mid-step, waiting for the voice to come again.
“Kurt! C’mere!”

Cautiously, Kurt peeked over the
edge of the bin and saw Scott, sitting cross-legged and staring up at him. “Scott? What’s wrong?” Kurt hurried around and squatted next to his
friend.

“Nothing…Just…Man, have I got to
tell you something!” A grin spread
across his face and Kurt quirked a brow.
“Jean and me…we’re together!”

“Wunderbar!” Kurt clapped his friend on the arm and
smiled broadly, his troubles not forgotten but momentarily put aside. “When?
Where? “ He wiggled his eyebrows and, mock-lasciviously, added “How?”

“Kurt! Sheesh!” Scott colored a
little and ducked his head. “Yesterday…she
just sort of told me. I was playing
video games with Bobby and then she was just there…” Scott trailed off, the expression on his
face becoming distinctly dopey.

“Well?”

“Well what?”

“Did you?” Kurt left not question just what he was
asking about by the tone of his voice.

“Um….no. Not really…no.” Scott
ducked his head then and stood. “But
yeah…Thought you would appreciate that, Mister Miracle.”

“Was?”

“Mister Miracle—Evan and Bobby
started calling you that when you got your crush on Kitty. Said if she went out with you, it’d be a
miracle.”

“Remind me to slap them around
later…” Kurt glowered, making Scott
chuckle.

“Where were you off to,
anyway?”

“Oh. The library. Wanted to
think about some things.” Kurt felt his
tension come flooding back, his hands twisting the straps of his back pack into
something resembling a strand of DNA.

“Anything I can help with?” The two were walking now, heading towards
the library in unspoken agreement.

“I don’t know…I really can’t say.”

“Kitty?”

“In a round about way, ja….Scott,”
Kurt stopped outside the doors to the school, pushing his bangs out of his face
with the back of one hand while working the corner of his untucked flannel
shirt with the other. “Have you ever lied to Jean?”

Scott narrowed his eyes. Dishonesty was not in Kurt’s nature,
especially where loved ones were involved.
“Why? Is there something going
on, Kurt?”

“It’s just…I want to tell Kitty
something but I can’t.” Kurt’s voice
was low and soft, making Scott strain his ears.

“What is it?” I swear, if he’s cheated on her, I’ll
kill him before she does. Kitty’s a
sister to me!

“I can’t say…”

Dangerously, Scott bit out
“Amanda? Tabitha?”

Kurt stumbled back a pace, looking
horrified. “Nein! Never!
I’d never do something like that to Kitty!” His hand clutched at his stomach in unexpected revulsion. “I can’t even think of hurting her without
getting physically ill, Scott!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…It’s just
weird that you asked me that and well,
infidelity is the biggest lie I can think of.”
Scott shook his head and sighed.
“The only lie I’ve ever told Jean is that I didn’t love her.”

“Worse lies to tell…” Kurt sighed and opened the door. “I have to keep a secret from Kitty…”

“Why?” Scott paused, half in and half out of the doorway. “I thought you two told each other just
about everything.”

“We do, usually. But I know something now that could hurt
her, a lot. She’d be furious, nein,
beyond furious with me if she found out I knew and didn’t tell her when she
finds out. If she finds out.”

“If?”

“Well, I’m not sure if this secret
is something to worry about. It could
all be conjecture.” Kurt shrugged. “I just don’t know.”

“This is the way I see it,
Kurt. You’re keeping this secret
against your will, right? And Kitty
trusts you implicitly, right? Kitty is
understanding, and she would forgive you this.
She would know that you didn’t want to hurt her…”

“Ja…I suppose. But it hurts so much hiding this from her
when I know it could make her happy.”

“Could or would?”

Kurt thought for a hard
moment. “Could.”

“It’s uncertain, then. It could also make her just as unhappy,
right?”

“Ja…”

“Then maybe you’re sparing her from
more pain.” Scott jerked his head in
the direction of the lockers and Kurt followed, the library forgotten.

“Maybe you’re right…but it still
hurts like hell.”

“Think of it this way, man, as long
as you’re hurting, she isn’t.” Scott
clapped him on the shoulder and smiled.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, there’s a certain redhead walking this
way…”

“Go on….I’ll never understand the
attraction to leggy redheads…” Scott
made a face at him and Kurt laughed, mulling over their conversation. When I get home, I’ll see Katzchen and
everything will be fine…

 

Scott caught up to Jean as she
swung into the gym, her bag of soccer stuff slung loosely over one
shoulder. “Hey, babe.”

“Babe? Do I look like a little pink pig to you[1]?” Her brow arched in disdain, but her smirk
gave her away.

Scott stopped a few feet from her,
his skin tingling with her nearness. “I just wanted to see you before class.”

“You saw me this morning.” And
some last night…

“Yeah, but not alone.” He closed the distance and put his hands on
her hips, pulling her towards him.

“Hey, now---Just kissing,
remember?” Jean was still skittish with
affection and she fluttered her hands nervously against his chest.

Scott brushed his lips over her
forehead and murmured against her skin, “I think what we did last night was
much more than kissing…much more intimate, don’t you think?” Truth be told, he had never felt so exposed
as he had when he let Jean into his mind, when she plundered his fantasies and
memories of everything that was her. He
had kissed her long and hard, pulling her into him through her mutation. For over and hour, he lay with his head
against her chest, growing more and more aroused and frustrated as she sought
image after image and he readily gave them to her. They had kissed, touched a little, but the psychic connection was
something beyond mere touch. The
sensation of having Jean in his mind was exquisite, sweet like honey as she
poured through his veins. It wasn’t
like being scanned for proof of a lie or just a cursory boredom scan—Jean was in
him, part of his thoughts, not just the object of them.

Jean was pink-tinged as she, too, remembered the
previous night. “Scott….I don’t know
what to say about that. I feel like I
should apologize!”

“For what?” He pressed her head against his chest and
toyed idly with the curls at the end of her ponytail. “You never have to apologize for something like that, Jean! It was more than mere kissing. The connection…I mean…wow!”

“I invaded
your mind!”

“No more
than I invaded your body at Christmas.
Did you want me then? Did you want what we did?”

Slowly, she
answered, “Yes…” the word muffled by his body.


“And did
you want last night?” I know you did…I know what you thought in the shower
and I know you wanted more than just thoughts.

“God,
yes.” Jean sucked in a deep breath and
tipped her chin up to see Scott. “But
Scott…”

“But
nothing, Jean!” He kissed her lightly
on the mouth. The sounds of the other
girls coming in from lunch to get ready for gym filtered down the hall and
Scott tapped her on the nose, leaning close to her ear to whisper, “Fait. it. You love me for my mind!” before walking away to the sounds of her
lilting laugh.

 

Kitty had
sat in the kitchen most of the day, sipping tea and lost in thought, mostly
about her dream. It was unlike her
usual dreams, which of late usually featured Kurt in some form or another. This dream, she decided, had meant
something. Seek the Goddess, he
said. Well, I don’t know any
goddesses. Wonder if it has something
to do with those statues in Amara’s room?
Lance thinks no one knows he’s in there but his voice carries…I’ll knock
later when more people are home. Don’t
want them to get busted like I did. Damn soft heart of mine. Kitty put the now-empty tea pot into the
dishwasher along with her cup and, while she was replacing the sugar bowl in
the pantry, she had a revelation. Storm!
She knows all sorts of god and goddess stuff!
And she was really nosy about my first dream…I’ll bet she knows what to
make of it! Kitty dusted her hands
down the front of her dress, brushing away errant cracker crumbs, and hurried
to find Storm. After several dead ends,
she found the woman in Beast’s lab, watering a small row of aloe vera[2]
plants she insisted on keeping there “for emergencies.” Kitty cleared her throat twice before Storm
noticed her standing in the doorway.

“Yes,
child?”

“I, um,
have a question for you.” Kitty
advanced a few steps into the room, wary of Storm’s cool demeanor.

“Out with
it…I don’t bite, you know.” Storm set
her watering can down and smiled gently, realizing that her old mask of
superiority had slipped into place.

“Well, you
see, I had this dream last night…”
Kitty nearly yelped with the suddenness of Storm’s approach.

“Was it the
man from the dream the other night?”

“Um,
yeah…How did you know?” Kitty did slip
back a little then, pressing against the doorframe.

“Kitty, how
into your yoga are you? Do you study the history? Do you know the sutras[3]?”

Kitty had
never seen this light in Storm’s eyes before.
“I know a little of the history...why?”

“I’ve been
waiting for you to come to me since your dream the other night. Come, my child! Follow me!” Storm hurried
from the room, Kitty trailing behind her warily. They wound their way through the mansion, ending up at Storm’s
suite of rooms. “Wait here…”

Kitty sat on the loveseat she had slept
on so many weeks ago and waited while Storm rummaged in her bedroom
proper. Weird…Storm never
rummages…She must be really twitterpated[4]
about something. “Find it?” Storm emerged from the room clutching
several books and some loose papers.

“Yes! Kitty, you need to read all of this…well, actually…” She flipped
through the first book and nodded to herself.
“Yes, I marked the pages the other night for just this purpose. Read the marked pages—they’ll help you
understand your dreams.” The books were
several volumes on Hindu mythology, dream interpretation, meditation, and books
about Shiva. Kitty paused at the last
two, staring hard before she realized the word was not meant the same was as
shiva for mourning.

“What is all this?”

“Just read it, child. Then come ask me anything you need to
know.”

Storm helped her to her feet and
ushered her to the door, excitement vibrating off of her body. Kitty was nervous now—she had never seen the
Weather Goddess so excited. Weather
Goddess…wait…”Storm…you were worshipped once, right?”

Storm paused and blinked in
surprise. “Well, yes. A long time ago, when I was but a girl. They thought I was a goddess…”

Kitty felt strange, like she was
falling. “Oh.”

“What’s wrong?”

“He…the man…said to ask the
Goddess…” Kitty shook herself and
peered into Storm’s eyes. “Om Namaha
Shiva…”

Storm smiled beatifically and
tapped the topmost book. “Read. Then ask me. You’ll find the mantra in there.”

Kitty found herself in the hallway,
a stack of books to her chest. Curiouser
and curiouser…

 

 

Kurt found
her laying face-down on an open book in the mansion’s library. He had been home from school for over an
hour and had practically torn the mansion apart looking for her. Several more books were stacked to one side,
pieces of paper sticking out at odd angles to mark passages. Kitty snored softly and Kurt almost did not
wake her, but temptation got the better of him so he slid into the seat next to
her and laid a gentle hand on her shoulder.
“Katzchen…” He shook her gently. “Liebes?
Can you hear me?”

“Mmmm.” She shifted and turned her head to face him,
a deep red mark scored across her nose and forehead from the book’s spine. Kurt stifled a laugh and shook her gently. Kitty blinked awake, then started at the sight
of Kurt peering at her. “Wha?”

“You were
sleeping.”

“Huh?
Where…Oh.” Kitty sat up and rubbed at
her face, stretching her back at the same time. Kurt sighed, watching her chest rise and fall, and hoped that she
would not notice his fixation on her feminine attributes.

“Good book,
then?” He flipped the cover to see the title.
“Shiva?”

“Nuh-uh…Shee-vah
is how you say this one. It’s a
god. A Hindu god.” Kitty shut the book and turned to Kurt. “Aren’t you supposed to be in class?”

“Katzchen, it’s
four o’clock in the afternoon…how long have you been down here?”

Kitty
chuckled. “Oh, since eleven this
morning…Must have lost track of time.”
She sighed and tapped his knee with her foot. “Storm is helping me make sense of my dreams the past couple of
nights.”

“Oh? Am I in any of these dreams?” He leaned forward, smiling winningly.

“Kurt, you
know I can’t…and besides, don’t you want to wait? My birthday is only…”

“Ja, I
know—two weeks and some odd days away.
But I didn’t want to have sex…okay, I did, but I just wanted to…I don’t
know…” he gestured vaguely, “show you I care?”

“You do
that all the time.”

“But I mean
in a, ah, tactile way.” Kurt blushed to
the roots of his fur. Kitty raised an
eyebrow and waited for details. “Um,
brush your hair?”

“Can’t—no
show of vanity.”

“Er…foot
rub?”

“You know
what that does to my willpower…” Kitty
sighed. “Face it, we just have to wait,
love.”

Kurt
thought furiously for a moment, then brightened as an idea occurred to
him. “Can I touch you?’

“Kurt…” she
said warningly, desperately wanting his touch just the same.

“Nein…I
mean, I can’t touch your skin with mine, but can I touch you with something
else?” He jittered in his seat a little
and Kitty felt the need to giggle.

“Um, it all
depends on what skin with what object.”

“Innocent,
Schatz, innocent…” Kurt cast about the
library for something then smiled.
“Wait here!” He was across the
room in back in seconds, returning with a marker from the pen cup on the desk
near the door. “Give me your foot.”

“What? No!”

“C’mon,
Katzchen! Give me your foot! I won’t rub it or kiss it or anything. I promise!”
He crossed his heart and held up his hand in a solemn salute.

Kitty
sighed, rolling her eyes. “Fine. Here
ya go.” She flopped her bare foot onto
his lap and settled back. “If you
tickle me, I won’t be amused.”

“Yes you
will. Just sit still, though, and it shouldn’t tickle. Much.”
Kurt raised his knees and braced her foot between them. She felt the
cool, wet nib of the marker on the sole of her foot and stifled a giggle while
at the same time thinking that it felt a
very little like Kurt’s tongue would.
Just not nearly as good, she amended to herself. After several moments, Kurt smiled happily.
“There. Done.”

“What’d you
do?” He released her foot and she
twisted to see what it said.
“Kurt…” On the sole of her foot,
he had written his name in bold black letters—Kurt Wagner—over a stick-figure
elf with a stick-figure girl, replete with ponytail, balanced on the elf’s
shoulders.

“I’m
supporting you. See? You’re standing on my shoulders. And I love you and I give you my heart. See? Has my name on it and everything!” Kurt grinned like a lovesick fool. Kitty bit her lip, feeling tears well
up. “Don’t cry—it’s supposed to be sweet!” Kurt pouted then, but only for effect.

“It is
sweet—that’s why I’m crying!” Kitty
broke her own rules then and leaned against his shoulder, crying into the fur
on his neck.

Kurt sighed
and patted her on the back, smelling the peach-scent of her hair and
perfume. If I live to be one
hundred, I’ll never understand women.
But so long as I get to live that long with Kitty, I’ll try my best…

 

 



[1] Baou
ou
know…the movie pig?

[2] Just in case
you don’t know, aloe vera is wonderful stuff.
Good for burns, make it into a drink for internal cleansing, good for
skin…tons of uses.

[3] Sutra is
like sermon. The gods all have sutras
pretty much and they are usually the “rules” for their worship and how to be a
good person (this is just the gist—the real explanation of sutras is pages
long). Yoga can be “divided” into
worship categories, like some types or positions are good for meditating on one
sutra or god… Anyhoo…Back to the story.

[4] From Bambi;
goofy in love or just plain goofy.


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