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Reviews for First Times at Bayville High

By : DrunkenScotsman

From MarvelFan98 on January 08, 2014
A great end to a great story. This really was overall one of the best X-men stories on here in quite a while. It may have had a few issues here and there but overall was a very good story that I'm sad to see end. I really hope you explore some of the things in your epilogue in future stories. There seems to be some really good stuff there. What ever you decide to do in the future I'm sure it will be great. Thanks for an amazing read and good luck in the future.
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From marvelmaster616 on January 03, 2014
Well this was a fairly satisfying ending to what has been a very interesting and innovative story. It was nicely structured, full of drama, and nicely detailed. That's not easy to find with X-men stories these days. lol So I thank you for taking the time to write something like this. Every girl had a unique story to tell and a unique emotional investment in their first time. It was diverse and pretty realistic in some areas. Again, your attention to detail is uncanny in that respect. That said, some of the characters were a little OOC and some of the circumstances were a little iffy. But that didn't take away from the overall enjoyment of the story. I actually wish it would be a bit longer, but the epilogue was nice. It seemed a little rushed, but it provided a kind of closure that rarely shows in a story. So again, I applaud you for that. I don't know if you plan to write another X-men story. I hope you do. You're very skilled and I think you do a great job. Keep up the good work.

MarvelMaster616
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From Daye on January 03, 2014
First off the completion of this project deserves nothing less than the most sincere congratulations. Well done! Sticking with a long project like this all the way through his hard!

Every chapter of this has been interesting and lovely. The voices of the different characters have always been expressed well and you've covered a remarkable amount of ground and different scenarios of the course of it. I'm in awe of it really.

And for this final chapter; well I do have to say the epilgoue style is not something I'm too fond of. It's interesting to hear some of the details but its thing that really breaks 'show not tell' and is rather at odds with the style of the rest of the fic.

On the other hand the first section where they are talking is still grade A dialogue and banter and its great to see them happier together after the evening's bonding.
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From Aysha on January 03, 2014
This really has been a five-star story all the way to the end. Coming to the conclusion of a great story I always feel a great sense of loss, because I feel as though I've developed a connection with the characters, and was a part of the story, because of how thoroughly the author drew me in; it takes a damn good author to accomplish that. I feel that since a lost now; I always wish the story could go on forever.

Looking forward to whatever comes next! Aysha.
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From redsliver on January 02, 2014
You've made it to the end my friend. Congratulations on your well told high concept porn. I particularly enjoy the acclimation of each story teller's voice for their individual chapters. Although, ah fahnd Rogue's trahing. You wrote an excellent piece. Thank you for sharing.
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From Aysha on December 01, 2013
I am happy to see that you managed to get this chapter out a little early. I'm glad you took the time to develop Rogue's and Cody's relationship over the summer, though it did feel a bit rushed in places. the character interaction were solid and felt natural.

this was a good chapter with a take on Rogue's story that I never would have thought of myself, which of course makes it that much better.

On a technical note, there were a couple of places where you accidentally left out some prepositions one being right in the beginning where you wrote. "We had dissect a frog." I think you intended to add the word "to" in there.

Thought you ought to know. Anyway, as always, looking forward to more Bayville and R+V as well.
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From Daye on November 29, 2013
Early FTaBH! That�s a pleasant surprise. Yay, it�s Rogue�s story. Ah gawd! That means more accents! Some places I�m not sure whether there�s a mistake or whether that�s what Southern Americans talk like. (like won�t for wasn�t or weren�t seemed to pop up a few times)

I think you�ve done a good job with their relationship. The details with Cody�s family and background are entertaining and do explain the connection they feel.

By the time the tow truck arrived, Cody had fingered me and I�d given him head. I�ll skip the details, since I�m yakking on as is. Boo! Bad Rogue, we like details!

Front clasp bra! Yummy!

Oh man you are cruel though, all this stuff about how happy they are, and how good the sex is, when we already know it ends with zappage.

That final paragraph is really excellent and sort of ties the whole thing about Rogue together. It�s great.

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From MarvelFan98 on November 29, 2013
Hey!

Glad to see another update, especially one that comes early. As always this chapter was great. It was kind of interesting how it seemed like when someone talked including Rogue, the accents were thicker then when she was telling the story, almost like her accent had thinned over time. It added an extra bit of depth that made the story seem more real. Not sure if it was on purpose or by accident but it worked really well either way. I also really like how you had their relationship grow over time rather then her just jumping right into the sex which wouldn't really fit her character as much in my opinion. Anyways, great chapter as always and I can't wait for the next one, even if it is the last.
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From Aysha on October 18, 2013
I've actually read this chapter twice now.the whole chapter was really cool from beginning to end. Wanda's confession two Rogue was unexpected, though night unappealing, however Rogue's reaction was disappointing. its really cool that Wanda did get to see Rogues massive juggs,and the proposed discussion between Jubilee and Wanda is intriguing to say the least.

I I think the end of the chapter was really interesting and was astory arc that hadn't occurred to me. I'm looking forward to the next chapter, just wish I didn't have to wait till December to read it.
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From marvelmaster616 on September 30, 2013
Nice chapter. Glad to see this story still moving along. Some very cute and very awkward moments between Wanda and Rogue. Maybe it's because I've been spoiled by the comics, but you actually made the idea of Wanda being a lesbian very believable. In the context of X-men Evolution, I can see why she would be attracted to women. Her being hooked on Rogue makes sense since they have similar styles. In fact, you could probably do a whole story about those two hooking up if you wanted. lol I'm not sure how old Rogue was in the cartoon when she first showed up, but she seemed old enough to have had a sexual experience. And those stats you mentioned from Mississippi are somewhat accurate in that it is the state with some of the worst teen pregnancy and STD rates in the country. I just hope you don't make her first time too dark. I thought Wanda's first time was entertaining and I hope you do something similar with this. Keep up the great work! Looking forward to the next chapter, whenever it comes out.

MarvelMaster616
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From Daye on September 29, 2013
Yay! More First times! And I�m learning new synonyms for intermission. Cool.

Feeling sorry for Wanda in this piece. Not an easy thing to hear at all. For Rogue as well especially in this continuity, where she was pretty much raised by Mystique iirc.

From there they had fallen, to spatter her sternum in a Rorshach-test pattern from clavicles to cleavage. Light striking the moisture produced a shimmer that Rogue found rather distracting, since it drew her eye to that area. I loved the description in this line and the dynamic between Rogue and Wanda.

The whole big tits thing was hilarious but, I don�t remember their racks being really that big in Evo. Certainly not compared to the main comics anyway.

As to the revelation at the end. Wow. That will certainly make an interesting story. Though yeah, certainly will canon right out the window I guess.

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From Daye on July 29, 2013
Well I caught up with this. I don't think its your strongest chapter but that could be because I can't bring myself to care very much about Wanda. But it was quite nice f/f scene. You captured her inexperience and confusion quite well.
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From RogueBHS on July 20, 2013
I've been reading this off and on for a while, so I wanted to finally leave you a review. It is a very nice story, and don't let anyone get you down about how you portray characters. What a lot of people forget is that fan fiction is AU, and an extension of how each author views characters. I've yet to be disappointed in the fic, and I can NOT wait to see fallout from the fact that Wanda's first time was with Risty...who Rogue would know was Mystique. My favorite char is Rogue, so I'm also dying to see what you'll do for her if she is indeed a virgin. But again, I've really enjoyed this so far, and am eagerly awaiting another chapter. :)
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From marvelmaster616 on July 18, 2013
This was a nice chapter. Not the best in the story, but definitely enjoyable. I think you handled the girl/girl scene with Wanda and who I assume is Risty very well. I can definitely see Wanda being a bit flexible with her sexuality. Given her history in X-men Evolution, it makes sense that she wouldn't have an ordinary approach to sex to say the very least. You're good with general depictions and anatomy. And the first-person perspective was a nice touch. Whatever your plans, I hope you continue this story. I'm not sure how many more of these first times you have left to tell, but I look forward to seeing what you have planned. Keep up the great work!

MarvelMaster616
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From Aysha on July 15, 2013
Aysha is beside himself, yes, yes he is; aside from the fact that this was some of the best all time F/F I have ever read and loved all the nuance's of this chapter. From the English accent to the odd English idioms.(sometimes its hard to believe they understand each other.) However one is forced to be curious, yes, yes one is, about a question Aysha posed a while back. Do you remember? Well do you?

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