Eye of the Beholder

Author’s Notes: Thank you blue_lioness, WeepingAngelOfDeath, Capt_Davy_Jones_Lover and Reed McCoy for your reviews. Not as funny as some of my past chapters, but still amusing none the less.

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“Mom, he said not to go through any trouble,” Amanda reminds her mother.

“Oh, it wasn’t any trouble at all,” Cathy happily tells her

“You’ve set the table with the good china, crystal, silverware, a lace table cloth and cloth napkins,” Amanda grinds out between her teeth. “Plus, you’ve made two different types of salads, three entrees, homemade rolls, God knows how many side dishes and you’re telling me that it’s not any trouble?”

“It’s a special occasion,” Cathy answers as she comes out of the kitchen carrying a green bean casserole and Amanda briefly wishes the inventor of that gastronomical nightmare was standing right there so she could take her frustration out on him or her. “After all, it’s not like you bring home men on a regular basis.”

“After what happened with Doug, do you blame me?” Amanda demands while following her mother into the kitchen and has a bowl of mashed potatoes thrust into her hands.

“I’ll admit that we were a bit…over enthusiastic,” Cathy admits as she picks up a platter of roast pork.

“You were certifiably insane, the whole lot of you,” Amanda flatly states while they head back to the dinning room.

“Well, if you just brought home guys a little more often…,” Cathy implies as they set their loads down.

“I’m not sure I’d put my worst enemy through what you put Doug through,” Amanda nearly growls, staring at the over laden table before her.

“Which says what about your relationship with Hank?” Mike chortles as he steps into the room.

“That I’m beginning to worry about his sanity,” she mutters under her breath before answering Mike. “Hank’s a big boy; he can take care of himself.”

“I bet,” Mike snickers suggestively before changing his attitude when Stuart walks into the room. “I put the presents you brought by the tree. I know how you women are about arranging things just so, so I left them in the bags.”

“Thanks, Mike,” Amanda sighs as the rest of her family joins her in the dining room, bringing in the last of the food with them. “Now I guess we’re just waiting for Hank.”

“He wanted to freshen up first and then he’ll be down,” Stuart tells her.

“Great,” she replies before adding under her breath, “and then the grilling can begin.”

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When Hank makes his way back downstairs, he finds Mike waiting for him.

“Ready for the Spanish Inquisition?” Mike asks with a grin.

“I’m sure it won’t be that bad,” Hank chuckles.

“I’d like to say that Stuart has mellowed with age, but I’d be lying through my teeth,” Mike chuckles and then steps closer to Hank, continuing quietly and quickly. “Don’t expect to get within arm’s reach of Amy while you’re here. The two of you will never be left alone at any time and every word, gesture and glance will be noted and analyzed. Trust me, I’ve been there.”

“Duly noted,” Hank replies, a bit shocked.

“Come on,” Mike cheerfully says with a wave as he starts to head down the hallway. “I’ll show you the way to the dining room.”

“Thank you,” Hank responds as he follows the other man.

“In there you’ll find your only hope of relief first thing in the morning,” Mike tells him, pointing to a closed door. “If you try to use the upstairs bathroom, be prepared to hold it…for a really long time. When taking a shower, make sure you take everything you need with you. Running around half dressed is frowned upon. If your showers take longer than five minutes, you’ll want to do them either in the evening before bed or really early in the morning…say about three a.m.”

“I shall definitely keep everything you’ve told me in mind,” Hank says as the sound of people talking grows louder and the scent of food gets stronger. “Thank you for your advice.”

“It’s the least I can do,” Mike replies with smile. “Good luck.”

Before Hank can respond, they step into the dining room where organized chaos in going on. Amanda had hold of the back of Paul’s shirt while Annie and Cathy are holding onto the twins, trying to keep the kids from killing each other. Mike calmly takes control of his son, drags him over to a chair and plops the boy down in it with Cathy and Annie following suit with the girls.

“Ah, Hank, good you’re here,” Stuart pleasantly calls out and waves to the seat to his left. “Please, sit here next to me.”

“I would be honored,” Hank replies as he steps up to the indicated chair.

The others start to take their seats as well and by the time everyone is seated, Hank realizes that he’s been effectively cut off from Amanda. To his right is Stuart, across from him is Cathy and Annie with a twin on either side of their mother and to his left is Mike, Paul and finally, at the other end of the table and hard to see unless he leans forward or backward is Amanda. Before he can say anything about the seating arrangements, heads are bowed as hands are clasped in prayer and Grace is said over the meal. Hastily, Hank bows his head in respect for their beliefs and customs and as soon as ‘Amen’ is murmured around the table he lifts his head and finds a salad bowl being offered to him.

“So, Hank, how did you and Amy meet?” Stuart asks in a friendly tone while Hank serves himself.

“We both attended a masquerade ball at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum back in October,” Hank answers as he passes the bowl on to Mike.

“Oooh, did you wear a pretty dress, Aunt Amy?” asks Bethany.

“I wore a very big dress,” Amanda answers.

“Who did you go as?” Beverly questions.

“Christine from The Phantom of the Opera,” Amanda replies

“Oooh, you must have been so pretty,” Bethany squeals. “Do you have pictures?”

“I believe there are pictures somewhere,” Amanda responds, turning a lovely shade of pink at the memory of them.

“Who did you go as, Hank?” Beverly inquires excitedly and Amanda can practically hear the man blushing.

“Beast, from Beauty and the Beast,” Hank mumbles.

Both of the girls squeal with glee and Stuart clears his throat, looking pointedly at his granddaughters as they open their mouths to fire off more questions. They look at their grandfather and then snap their mouths close in unison. Looking for all the world like someone’s told them that Christmas has been delayed until summer, the girls turn back to their plates.

“So, how exactly did you two meet at this party?” Stuart questions as he takes a bite of his salad. “I imagine there were a lot of people there.”

“I fell on him,” Amanda bluntly tells him and Mike nearly spits the wine he had been sipping across the table and quickly goes to dry off the liquid dribbling down his chin with the napkin from his lap.

“Well, in all fairness, I did sneak up behind you and startle you,” Hank responds and Mike barely manages turn his laughter into a cough.

“Perhaps you two should start from the beginning,” Stuart suggests, sounding a bit less than amused.

Hank looks across the table and sees Cathy and Annie sitting there with their mouths hanging open while the girls are trying to hide their giggles. A quick glance down the table and he notices that Mike and Paul are only doing slightly better than the twins. Once the startled adults have regained their composure, Hank and Amanda recount their first meeting, both thankful that they went over this on the long drive down, selectively editing parts out for their younger audience members. By the time they’re done telling their tale, the other adults are pretty much speechless and dinner is nearly over.

“That’s going to be one heck of a story to tell your kids some day,” Mike finally says with a chuckle and Amanda immediately turns bright red.

“Let’s not jump the gun here,” Stuart warns, nearly glaring at his son-in-law.

“Amanda and I are in no rush to start a family any time soon,” Hank assures the older man.

“Don’t you want to have kids?” Cathy asks, sounding worried and a little hurt.

“Someday, perhaps, but I will not force the issue,” Hank answers. “This is a decision that should be made by both partners. Bringing a child into this world is a very big decision that should never be taken lightly.”

“And of course there is the matter of being married first,” Stuart states firmly.

“Not a requirement for children, but I would prefer to be married to the mother of my child as I feel it gives a more stable life to the child,” Hank assures the man.

As he talks he can see Cathy casting nervous glances at Amanda, but the older woman says nothing else as she goes back to her dinner. Amanda, for her part, acts like she didn’t see her mother’s worried expression and goes on eating. This doesn’t help Cathy’s mood and the older woman starts to fidget like she’s dying to say something, but doesn’t dare.

“Dinner is quite delicious, thank you” Hank tells Cathy, effectively pulling the woman’s attention away from her eldest daughter.

“Oh, you’re quite welcome,” Cathy hastily replies, turning her green eyes back to her blue guest. “I’m glad you’re enjoying it, but save room for dessert.”

“What’s for dessert?” Paul asks excitedly.

“Well, there’s apple pie, lemon squares and chocolate cake,” Cathy happily answers and Annie gets a horrified look on her face while Hank is sure he can hear Amanda rolling her eyes.

“I wish you had said something before I had second helpings,” Mike groans as he leans back in his seat and lays a hand on his belly.

“Grandma, may we have some dessert please?” Bethany requests.

“We ate all of our dinner including our veggies,” Beverly adds, proudly showing her empty plate.

“That’s up to your mother,” Cathy tells them.

“If they get dessert, then I want some too,” Paul demands.

“You haven’t finished your dinner,” Mike points out.

“But I hate carrots,” Paul pouts.

“Finish your carrots and then we’ll talk dessert,” Mike replies.

“I’m full,” Paul states.

“Then you’re obviously too full for dessert,” Mike shoots right back.

“That’s not fair!” Paul nearly shouts.

“Inside voice, please, young man,” Annie says in a commanding voice. “Your father is right, if you want dessert you need to finish your dinner first.”

Paul scowls at his plate and mumbles something under his breath that causes Hank to raise his eyebrows.

“What was that, young man?” Annie growls, cold, hard green eyes staring at her son and Hank immediately recognizes that stare as the one Amanda uses on occasion.

“Nothing,” Paul grumbles before stabbing a couple pieces of carrot and sticking them in his mouth.

“May I be excused, Mom?” Bethany asks.

“Me too, please,” Beverly adds.

“Yes, you two may go,” Annie sighs and the twins nearly leap up from the table, taking their dirty dishes with them.

A moment later and Amanda and Annie are also rising from the table, taking not only their dirty plates and cutlery, but a serving bowl with them as they leave the room. Soon after the women leave, the younger set of twins returns and starts to help clear the table while their brother continues to work his way through his carrots, taking large swallows of his milk between bites. Hank finishes his last bite and gets ready to get up only to have his plate cleared by Amanda as she goes around collecting the dishes with the exception being Paul’s plate as the boy glares at the last three pieces of carrot on his plate.

“So, Hank, what made you ask Amy out?” Stuart asks as he picks up his wine glass and cautiously takes a sip.

“A friend suggested I ask her out,” Hank answers. “I’m glad she did, too. The past month and a half have had some of the best days of my life in it.”

He glances over at Amanda and sees that her cheeks are a bright pink as she makes a hasty retreat out of the room.

“So a female friend told you to ask my daughter out,” Stuart clarifies, eyebrows slightly raised.

“Yes, Ororo Munroe,” Hank replies, turning his attention back to the older man. “She’s headmistress at Xavier’s now and one of my oldest and dearest friends.”

“How is the school doing now that its founder is no longer there?” Stuart inquires and Hank is able to tell that the man is sincerely interested.

“It’s not quite the same as before, but the school’s mission is too important to let it die with its founder,” Hank tells him truthfully. “So the school goes on and the students continue to learn and thrive.”

“It’s good to know that kids like Serena are given a chance to reach their full potential in a safe and caring environment,” Stuart says sincerely.

“I can see now where Amanda gets her fine moral character from,” Hank says with smile.

“Thank you,” Stuart replies proudly. “We like to think that we did an ok job raising our girls.”

“Even if one of them did turn out to be a lawyer,” Mike snickers quietly.

“A lawyer who spent her own time and money to defend a young mutant when no one else would,” Hank points out.

“I helped with that, you know,” Paul pipes up suddenly.

“Did you now?” Hank asks, a bit amused.

“Yeah, I got the video off of the broken camcorder,” Paul tells him.

“Oh really?” Hank says in surprise.

“Yeah, Paul’s quite the computer wiz,” Mike states proudly as he ruffles his son’s hair. “If it’s electronic, he can set it up and figure it out before you even get the directions out of the box. Now finish your dinner, please, young man.”

Paul makes a grumbling sound, stabs the last pieces of carrot onto his fork and then reluctantly stuffs them into his mouth. He chews and swallows as fast as he can and then quickly washes it down with the last of his milk.

“Uck,” Paul gags with a disgusted look on his face.

“You know, when I was a kid, I didn’t like to eat my vegetables either,” Hank confides in the young boy. “And if I didn’t eat them, my mother gave them to me for breakfast. Back then there weren’t any microwaves so I got to eat them cold.”

“Ooh, we hadn’t thought of that one before,” Mike happily states as a look of horror passes over his son’s face. “Cold veggies for breakfast. I’ll have to let Annie know about that one.”

“May I be excused, please?” Paul asks in a small voice.

“Yes, you may,” Mike answers and the boy beats a hasty retreat with his dirty plate in hand.

“You wouldn’t really make him cold vegetables, would you?” Hank inquires.

“We might,” Mike answers. “Getting that kid to eat vegetables is like pulling teeth.”

“You know, his mother wasn’t much better,” Cathy tells them. “She used to feed her lima beans to the cat.”

“You had a cat that ate lima beans?” Mike laughs.

“Bandit was a strange cat,” Stuart replies.

“Bandit had personality,” Cathy counters with a smile.

“Did Amanda feed her lima beans to the cat, too?” Hank asks just as Amanda returns to clear more items from the table.

“No, she rolled her peas under the hutch when I wasn’t looking,” Cathy tells him and Hank can’t help but laugh.

“Did you really roll your peas under the hutch?” Hank questions his red faced girlfriend.

“What else was I supposed to do with them?” Amanda demands. “Even Bandit wouldn’t eat them and I had to do something with those mushy green balls of poison.”

“Something tells me I’m going to be hearing a lot of interesting stories this coming week,” Hank muses with a chuckle and Amanda makes a noise between a whimper and a groan as she quickly heads back to the kitchen.