Eye of the Beholder

Author’s Notes: Thank you Vixey and Christina for your reviews.

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“So, how was your day, my dear?” he asks after the server has taken their orders and left.

“Ok, I guess,” she replies with a shrug. “Nothing major usually happens around this time of year. It’s usually just doing the research and making the phone calls, so nothing exciting. How about you?”

“Actually, the UN isn’t in session this time of the year so I just spent the day packing and tidying up my apartment,” he tells her.

“You know, you’ve seen both of my apartments and I have yet to see yours,” she casually mentions.

“It would be my great honor to show you my apartment when we’re both back in New York,” he replies, his voice dropping down into a sultry purr as he picks up her hand and kisses her palm.

“That didn’t quite come out the way I meant it to,” she says in a shaky voice and she looks at the hand that’s holding hers. “We need to talk.”

“Open communication is the way to understanding,” he says as he laces her fingers through his. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Us,” she quietly replies, continuing to stare at their hands.

“And what would you like to know about us?” he asks, keeping his voice calm and soothing as he rubs his thumb over hers.

“Where are we going?” she questions softly. “Is this a long term thing or are you simply looking for someone to keep your bed warm at night?”

“While I do desire you physically, I am most certainly not looking for a bed warmer,” he answers, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “I would like nothing more than to spend the rest of my life getting to know you. And you? What are you hoping to get out of this relationship?”

“I would like someone I could spend the rest of my life with,” she responds. “I would really like it if that person was you.”

“That’s good to hear,” he says in a controlled voice, his thumb going still and his fingers loosening as if he’s about to pull away.

“And if you don’t think I desire you physically, then you haven’t been paying attention,” she states as she tightens her own digits around his and finally looks up at him with eyes dark with more than just friendship.

“Are we ready to take our relationship to that next level?” he inquires.

“My body is screaming ‘yes’, but my head is saying ‘no’,” she answers.

“Why the debate?” he asks.

“I haven’t had the best luck when it comes to men,” she admits.

“I understand,” he replies. “You told me on our first date how you lose men because you refuse to sleep with them.”

“I’m talking about before I made that decision,” she tells him. “Since we’re talking about it, I might as well get it over with. I’ve had sex all of twice in my life. The first time was ok and the second time was a complete disappointment.”

“Ah,” he says, a bit surprised by the sudden confession.

“When I’m around you, I want to be touched by you so bad that I’m on the verge of screaming,” she says just before swallowing a lump in her throat.

“But…?” he prompts, knowing there’s more.

“I’m afraid I’ll be disappointed again,” she states softly.

“Remember when I told Maggie that I would spend hours with you if we ever made love?” he asks and she nods. “You don’t really think I would spend all of that time just seeking my own gratification do you?”

“God, I hope not,” she replies in a breathless whisper.

“Now that you have given me your, ah, history, perhaps I should divulge mine,” he says.

“I’m guessing Ororo and Tilby,” she states. “Are there more that I should know about?”

“No, they’re it,” he admits and she gives a small sigh of relief. “I suppose I have the unfair advantage of never having met any of your past lovers.”

Suddenly, her fork becomes very interesting and he stares at her in shock.

“I have met them, haven’t I?” he questions.

“Him,” she corrects, still studying her eating utensil. “I don’t know where Keith is and I couldn’t care less quite frankly.”

“I’m guessing Keith was your second lover,” he says and she nods her confirmation. “So I have met the first man to have the pleasure of your company in bed?”

She nods a ‘yes’, still admiring her fork.

“Is it one of your coworkers?” he asks worriedly.

She shakes her head ‘no’.

“Then it’s a friend,” he sighs in a bit of relief. “Ron’s a handsome man. Is it him?”

She shakes her head again.

“Well, if it’s not Ron, then it must be Tim.”

Her head shakes once more.

“Ryan?”

Shake.

“Sam?”

Shake.

“But that just leaves…”

“Yeah.”

“But he’s…”

“Yeah.”

“Oh my stars and garters,” he moans. “I know you don’t have to tell me, but I would really like to know how that happened.”

“We were drunk,” she admits.

“Your birthday,” he states, a bit flabbergasted and a little more than horrified.

“Yeah,” she admits.

“But he’s…,” he starts, still having trouble wrapping his mind around it.

“He hadn’t quite come to terms with it yet,” she tells him.

“So when did he come to terms with his homosexuality?” he asks a bit more forcefully than he intended.

“The next morning,” she answers.

“Ouch,” he winces in sympathy.

“Tell me about it,” she grumbles. “I was sitting at his kitchen table staring at my coffee, trying to come to terms with the mother of all hangovers when he walked in, said, ‘I think I’m gay’ and then he walked out of the apartment.”

“That must have hurt terribly,” he says softly, his thumb resuming its rubbing. “I’m surprised that the two of you have remained friends.”

“I grew up thinking that the first man I slept with would be my one true love,” she continues, tightening her grip on his hand. “It shattered my faith in a lot of things when I realized that it wasn’t true. I had known Doug for over a year and we had become instant best friends and to have him do that to me hurt me so bad that I didn’t talk to him for nearly three months. It’s was during that time when I met Keith. I thought we had a connection and then we slept together. I quickly found out that not only was I nothing more than a notch in his bedpost, but that I was to blame for not enjoying the sex.”

“I certainly hope that I never meet this cad,” he growls. “Otherwise, I might do terrible things to him.”

“I’d hold your coat and sell tickets to it if you did,” she tells him fervently. “After that fiasco, I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. I guess the good that came out of the whole mess is that Doug came and found me, groveled for forgiveness and then showed me that there’s life after stupidity.”

“So that’s why he’s so concerned about your love life,” he muses.

“Yeah, a little too concerned sometimes,” she sighs and then gives a small smile. “But I love him enough not to kill him even when does interrupt a first kiss.”

“It must have been torture for him not to be told about our date,” he says.

“Especially after he saw the dress I bought for it,” she chuckles.

“You do delight in making people think you’re evil, don’t you?” he teases.

“A girl’s got to have some fun,” she smirks.

“Incorrigible,” he chuckles as he raises her fingers to his lips and her breath catches in her throat.

Before anything more can happen, their dinners arrive and reluctantly, they have to let go of each other. They eat in silence for a little while before a disturbing thought makes her stomach twist.

“Were you able to find out if James was invited?” she asks, fear gnawing at her gut.

“I did receive a list of everyone who was invited and James was not on the list,” he answers and she gives out a sigh of relief. “However, that doesn’t mean he didn’t get invited as someone’s guest.”

“Well, here’s to hoping he couldn’t find someone to bring him along,” she says quietly.

“I promise, if the cad should be there, he will not lay one hand on you,” he swears.

“How can you be so sure?” she questions.

“I have my ways,” he answers mysteriously.

“What have you got up your sleeve, Ambassador?” she asks suspiciously, eyes narrowed.

“Nothing but my arm, I assure you,” he responds jovially.

“You’re up to something,” she accuses, trying to keep the smile off of her lips.

“Six foot one and holding,” he tells her with a grin and she can’t help but chuckle.

“Now who’s being incorrigible?” she inquires with a snicker.

“I prefer the term mysterious,” he replies with a smile.

“Sneaky and devious is more like it,” she teases just before she takes a bite of food.

“I resent that comment,” he responds in a fake huff.

“More like resemble it,” she tosses back, unable to keep the smile off of her lips.

“You’re playing with fire again, young lady,” he playfully warns, waggling a finger at her.

“Since it’s supposed to snow tonight, I don’t mind,” she says. “I’ll be nice and warm.”

“I can think of other ways to keep you warm,” he purrs and she can feel all of the right places tingling.

“Is now a bad time to mention that I’m not on the pill?” she moans, part in need, part in regret.

“Then it’s a good thing that I stopped by the drug store earlier today,” he whispers in her ear and she can’t stop the small groan that escapes.

“We’re still in separate rooms, right?” she asks in a hushed whisper.

“Yes, but I did ask for conjoining rooms,” he answers softly.

“Are we taking this too fast?” she softly asks.

“Probably, but I don’t want to slow down,” he tells her truthfully.

“God, if my parent’s ever find out about this weekend, I’m dead meat,” she groans.

“You can always back out if you want,” he tells her, every part of him begging and pleading with any higher power that she won’t change her mind.

“I didn’t spend all that time picking out a dress not to wear it,” she tells him bluntly with a sly look on her face.

“Yes, I noticed the garment bag,” he says. “I hope it wasn’t too much trouble to pick out.”

“No, Doug and I made a day of it,” she replies. “The only problem was keeping him out of the men’s department. That man needs another suit like I need another hole in my head.”

“Do I get to see the dress before tomorrow night?” he asks.

“No,” she answers coyly. “In fact, you won’t get to see it until we’re at the party.”

“Hardly seems fair,” he pouts.

“You’ll understand tomorrow,” she tells him as she finishes her dinner.

“Must be some dress,” he muses.

“You have no idea,” she chuckles.

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Several hours later they finally arrive at The Hays-Adams Hotel, getting there just as the first fat snow flakes start to drift down to the earth. The trunk is unloaded as quickly as possible onto a waiting luggage cart and they hustle inside, grateful to be out of the bitter cold. He quickly goes to check them in while she leans against a pillar for support, barely able to keep her eyes open.

Once he has their keys, he goes and finds her almost asleep on her feet and he quietly chuckles. She manages to crack an eye open to look at him and he smiles at her. With a great deal of effort, she pushes herself off of the pillar and goes to lean on him. He gently wraps an arm around her waist to support her and then guides her over to the elevators.

By the time they reach the first room, he’s nearly carrying her. He deposits her on the bed and then quickly goes to open the first door that joins their rooms. By the time he turns back around, she’s pulling her dress boots off, though with a little bit of difficulty.

“Do you need help?” he asks.

“No, I think I’ve got it,” she answers as she finally gets the second boot to let go of her foot. “Have our bags made it up yet?”

“Not yet,” he replies just as there’s a knock at the door. “But that’s probably them right now.”

He goes to answer the door while she tries to convince her fingers to grab hold of the zipper tongue on her coat so that she can get out of it. By the time the luggage is unloaded, the bellhop tipped and the door closed, she’s still fumbling with the stupid thing. He quietly chuckles as he goes to help her and he can feel Beast stirring within him.

“Do you need help with anything else?” he questions as she slips her coat off.

“No, I should be good,” she replies as she heads for the pile of luggage. “I just want to go to bed right now and sleep for the next couple of days.”

“Well, I can definitely let you get some sleep, but I will have to wake you in time to go to the party,” he tells her.

“I’m pretty sure I didn’t pack this much,” she states staring at the large pile of bags.

“Some of them are mine,” he assures her as he picks up his stuff. “I’ll be in the next room. Just knock on the door if you need anything.”

“Ok,” she sleepily agrees, only getting about half of what he said.

He smiles at her, gives her a gentle little kiss and then hands her the room key. He heads for his own room, Beast screaming at him the entire way and quickly stows his own items once he’s through the door. After preparing for bed himself, he goes to check on her going through the attached doors to do so.

He finds her already fast asleep in her own bed and he resists the urge to crawl under the covers with her, but only just. He gently brushes a stray strand of hair out of her face and carefully kisses her cheek. She lets out a sigh as she slips into a deeper stage of sleep and with great reluctance, he returns to his room to get some much needed rest.