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A Bucky Barnes Winter Soldier Fic - The Constant	By : TheConstant1944 Category: Marvel Verse Comics > Captain America Views: 2391 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own any Marvel characters. They are solely owned by Marvel and MCU. No money is made from this story.

Chapter List
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Chapter Twenty-Seven
The Constant - Understanding the Mind Wipe

You study the doctor in front of you. He is patient, and that is a good thing. He can see you are lost and haven't a clue what he is talking about. Stefan has arranged for him to talk to you under the pretence that as the the patient's companion you need to know, and that as a nurse you need to understand. You want to understand. But this feels beyond your comprehension, and most doctors do not like to repeat themselves. Stefan knows this one is tolerant. It is why he chose him as the one to explain.
The doctor taps the table with his pen, and you can see him thinking.
“Okay.” he says, grabbing a piece of paper. He draws the outline of a head with the brain nestled inside. “Lets see if I can simplify it.” He is not being condescending, he knows how highly complex it is – even some physicians wouldn't understand.
He points out the different parts of the brain, paying special attention to one part in particular. “This is where we do our work.”
He is one of the team bought in to perfect the mind wipe that they will be using on the Winter Soldier. You have gotten lost in the technicalities of it. You want to understand. You want to know what your patient will be going through.
“Thoughts, memories, everything we know and believe is stored in here. Imagine a space full of different shapes, different sizes, and each one is tethered with a piece of string to the central cortex. A bit like a bunch of mismatched balloons. Each shape is a memory, or a thought, or an action, something he has learnt, something he has memorised.” He draws in a bunch of shapes attached by a thin thread of ink. “Okay. Now to us it is all muddled. We have to work out which pieces he needs to keep and which pieces need to go. No good getting rid of how he learnt to speak, but we don't want him remembering when he learnt to speak because we don't want him to remember his childhood. So the mind wipe is like a giant pair of scissors. We will cut away the memories and things we don't want him to retain and leave those he needs to keep to function.”
“You destroy them?” you ask.
“Well that is a point of argument. Some of us believe it just disables them, others think it destroys them. It is one of those things that honestly we just don't know.”
“So if we go with the theory they are untethered...then they are not lost and the patient could get them back?” you ask, and he looks at you.
“Yes and no. They will be untethered but once the string is cut it cannot re-tether itself. It is lost. Even if, for some reason, it did re-tether itself it would be out of context, a memory that has no beginning or end. The human brain is one of the most complex things on this earth and we just don't know enough about it.”
You want to ask if Zola's serum could re-tether the string, but you decide not to. You don't want to put that thought into their minds.
Such a simple thing that they, in actual fact, have never considered.
The doctor continues. “So, we come along and get rid of the balloons that we do not want him to keep and his mind comes out as so. It is a very basic explanation of a mind wipe.” He draws the shape of the brain again with the part they work on, and this time it has fewer tendrils with shapes attached to it.
“So - if I have got this right - you keep practical things like how to walk, talk, eat, sleep, and who he now is...but not who he was?”
The doctor nods and then adds: “We need to also keep more serious in depth learning such as his training with weapons, etcetera, as well as things such as the string with your name on it so he remembers you as his Constant,” at this the doctor smiles.
“But how do you know which strings to cut and which ones to leave alone?”
His smile falters. “One of Zola's algorithms in tandem with our own studies. We have had...practice. We may not always get it right each time so you may find that sometimes he is a little...distracted, maybe upset, even angry. Perhaps he will not remember something that he should. Of course,” he continues, “the first mind wipe will be the worst. That is the one we need to get rid of as much of his memory as we can...well that he has left after...you know...” Here he actually blushes a bit. You want to fill the rest of it in for him you mean after Lehmann literally scraped the flesh from his bone, broke his mind and split it into two but you also want to keep him on your side and so you just nod to show you know what he is talking about.
He continues: “...but then all the subsequent wipes will be to just remove anything he has picked up in between that we don't need him to remember.”
You are quiet as you take this in and then he carries on.
“We have decided to do the mind wipe before he is put in cryo freeze each time. That should help keep him from dreaming. Then, when he awakens, we take him for programming. I can't tell you much about that part but returning to our example...” He pulls up the piece of paper again. “Each level of the program is like a new balloon with a tether that we sew in, we also have to try and give it context, so it makes sense to him when he accesses it.”
“Such as?” you ask.
“Well... say one for reiterating who he is, who Hydra is, and his loyalty to us. Mission details. At the end of it all we will have a functioning Winter Soldier.”
A functioning murderer, you think to yourself.
You look again at the pictures he has drawn. “Will the mind wipe hurt him?” you ask.
He looks at you a bit surprised. “Good God girl, of course it will. We are pulling his mind to shreds. We have to de-construct it every time, cutting him off from things he has had trapped in there since goodness knows when. Some of the equipment we use is laser driven and will burn away brain matter, which is why some people believe the balloons are completely destroyed, not just the strings. It will be agony for him. But at the end of it we hope that he is left with a calm oasis, ready to slot in the programming.”
A calm oasis. Sounds almost appealing if you didn't know the suffering it will cause the Winter Soldier. You want to remind him about what he said about the anger he mentioned, about the distraction, but you don't. The problem with doctors and scientists is that they have no bedside manner. He would not dream of telling you that it would not hurt if it didn't. It does not occur to him that this is something they should not be doing to another human being.
“Will you use anaesthetic?” you ask anxiously, but deep down you know the reply.
“No. We need the brain to be conscious and functioning. I guess there may be times we have to put him under, but the majority of the time he will be conscious for it.”
“So you are close to having this up and running?”
“Oh yes very close, we just need to iron out a few...wrinkles.” As he says this the doctor pictures the latest poor bastard they used the sequence on. It wasn't a pretty sight. “We will just need to calibrate the machine to the Winter Soldier's mind.”
“What will the pain be like?” You still cannot get past that stage.
“Hmm. I would imagine like a thousand needles being plunged into his brain, or if you prefer a thousands wasps stinging continuously...it won't be pleasant, but it can't be helped. Now...” He looks at his watch. “...If that is all I must get going, things to do.” He says smiling and standing up. He gathers up his papers and you follow suit.
“One last question doctor.” He looks over the top of his glasses at you. “Can I be there when you...when you're doing the wipes?” you ask.
“I personally can't see a problem - in fact it might help to keep the patient calmer - but you need to check with Director Lehmann on that. It will be his call.”
You put out your hand to shake.
“Well thank you for taking the time to explain it to me in layman's terms, I do appreciate it,” you say, smiling.
Smiling when all you want to do is hit his head into the table repeatedly until his brains are splattered over the entire top. You need to keep these people believing you are interested in their work, that you find it fascinating because you want to learn as much as you can. You hate kowtowing to them but every time you learn a bit more you feel it will help you understand what the Winter Soldier will finally be.
And more importantly, if there is a chance James is still in there and can be bought back.
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A Bucky Barnes Winter Soldier Fic - The Constant