Making Mr. Right | By : Prentice Category: Marvel Verse Comics > Iron Man Views: 2263 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Iron Man, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
So, okay, the thing about being fucked without actually being fucked – a sad state of affairs as far as Tony was concerned because, really, there was only so many times he could jerk off without it getting kind of repetitive and chafing, even if he had a superb fucking imagination and an almost completely perfect-in-every-way android learning to fucking prowl around his bedroom with unsteady newborn baby legs that meant that he bumped into Tony all the fucking time so that Tony was basically a walking hard-on at any given moment.
But, anyway, the thing about fucked was that it really messed with your head. Like, a lot. And not even in a good way, where you stayed up all night drinking Red Bull, playing Galaga, and just blasting Queen's A Night at the Opera through your speakers so that asshole TA who lived next door and who actually had the nuts to say that Tony's math was wrong when Tony's math was never fucking wrong (so much so that Tony was sure that one day someone somewhere would write a fucking sonnet to how goddamn impeccable his math was) would stay up all night banging on the wall and slowly losing his mind to Freddy Mercury.
No, it wasn't that kind of vindictively good messing with your head. Instead it was a messy, ridiculous, probably illegal in three states kind of mess with your head that Tony wasn't really sure what do with other than ignore entirely. Or, okay, ignore as best he could because at some point in the last few weeks Jarvis had perfected his smile for maximum devastation and holy fuck Tony was only human, okay.
He was only human and his dick could only take so much, even if he was a hormonally charged teenager who's every other thought pretty much focused on making his cock happy. That, honestly, was pretty easy these days. Especially with someone like Jarvis basically blossoming into perfection in front of his very eyes every single day and making the whole chafing issue a real problem.
But, at any rate, Tony wasn't really good at figuring out what exactly to do with all these fucked up emotions bubbling up inside him every time Jarvis mastered a new skill set and just generally exceeded expectations all over the place. Which, really, wasn't that surprising because not only was Jarvis a self-teaching, self-evolving artificial intelligence whose body had enough strength in it to bulldoze down a small fucking building if he really wanted to, he also happened to look really good in the three-piece suits he'd somehow managed to order without Tony knowing. Like, we're talking GQ levels of hotness, where just looking at him kind of melted your brain and lowered your IQ about a thousand points.
And, the funny thing about that was, Tony hadn't really set out to make Jarvis so fucking hot but apparently Jarvis had because even though Tony'd had a hand in building him, he hadn't been the one to choose how Jarvis looked in the end. It had all been Jarvis, who'd tweaked and tweaked and tweaked Tony's work until he was satisfied with the outcome. Which basically boiled down to Jarvis being just Tony's type – and how fucked up was that? Tony hadn't even realized he had a type until Jarvis had come along and just kind of settled into Tony's life like he'd always been there.
Like he'd just been waiting for Tony to get his shit together and build him already because he was tired of just being that half-thought out idea in the back of Tony's mind. Like he was ready to be a real boy already, hello, thank you. And, holy fucking shit, that was kind of a scary thought for Tony because apparently…apparently…
He was more doomed than he'd first thought and that just wasn't fucking fair. Even if it was kind of awesome. Scary, but still awesome.
And, really, that was okay, because he was Tony Fucking Stark and he could do or face anything. Up to and including one day maybe, possibly asking his unbearably hot cyber-android-AI-BFF on a date and dealing with all these feelings he was having about him. But not today.
Today he was going to continue swimming in the waters of denial and enjoy being a teenage-genius-billionaire-MIT student who, like everyone else around there, had a really fucking smart computer for a friend.
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