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Spirited Away	By : AkumaKawa Category: Marvel Verse Movies > Avengers, The Views: 3922 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: Nothing of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Iron, The Avengers, Thor belongs to me, no money made

Chapter List
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I had posted the original chapter several months back when I got an offer from someone to beta it. I went through a major re-write of what was first three chapters.
I had also added a countdown to the story since I was able to get my hands on a MCU timeline (google search tiki-toki MCU timeline). Then I realized I had the year wrong for IM3 and that it takes place 18 months after The Avengers not 6 months later like I had thought. So I had to tweak things again. I also found a better MCU timeline (google search MCU wikia) as well.
After that beta left me in the lurch I went to poor Anna and she picked it up. I also changed the format and switched things around by making each day in the countdown get its own chapter. Because they were originally part of the first chapters I will posted them a couple at a time to get everything caught up.
For those curious you can find original chapter 1 and 2 at my journals.
I'm so very sorry for the long wait. But at least the fic is better, right?
As always I give blanket permission for you guys to play with my creations, fanart, fanmixes, fanfiction, fanvideos, etc playing with my universe, characters, and so forth is given. Just dedicate it to me and give me porn. :D

Thursday July 19, 2012 T minus 295 Days

It's a little more than a year and two months after The Battle of New York when Tony starts to realize that something is happening around him.
At first, Tony thought it might be tied to his anxiety over what happened in New York.
However, it wasn't the battle in New York, Loki defenestrating him out of his own penthouse, nor fighting the Chitauri that haunted Tony every time he closed his eyes and started to drift away into the realm of dreams. No, it was the dark void of space and what Tony saw and felt in that place as he delivered the nuke to destroy the Chitauri mothership.
It was a hot day in New York that May but in that cold deadness of space Tony couldn't feel the sun's blazing rays. All he felt was a chill pass through his body like someone had walked upon his grave. For in that emptiness of space Tony could feel eyes upon him. Sense the presence of other beings beating upon his mind trying to get in. And he could have sworn he saw flickering images of something out of the corner of his eyes.
As terrifying as it was to experience the hell of that day it didn't even compare to the nightmares that visited him nearly every night since. In that realm Tony doesn't just feel the presence of other creatures, he sees them, visibly in front of him in that dead not-so-empty space, some sort of Lovecraftian Eldritch beings that eat at his mind's rationality. Nearly every night since that he goes to sleep, Tony hears their voices in his mind as they call out for him, Antaine, Antaine, come home. Come home to us Antaine.
Trapped in the dream, Tony could feel a deep clawing fear scraping its way out of his body as a primal scream of terror, as he felt something deep within him answer those calls and want to drag him into madness. The screams he cannot voice in his nightmares are vocalized when he wakes shrieking and shaking out of those nightmares.
Tony cries out 'don't touch me' 'I don't belong to you' 'leave me alone' repeatedly over and over as if a mantra as he scrapes and claws his shaking body all the way to his bathroom in order to escape them as if he was still trapped in the mindset of the nightmares. He locks himself in and rinses his face off refusing to even look into the mirror, fearful of seeing their eyes staring back at him from his reflection.
Those are the nights he spends the rest of the dark hours and daylight working in his lab designing and building new armor suits to be ready for when they come for him. Deep inside of him, Tony feels that they will. That they are.
It's those nightmares and the aftermath of them which make Tony doubt that anything abnormal or even paranormal was actually happening around him.
Tony was able to deny everything he saw and felt because he believed it was all in his head. How was he to trust what he saw, heard, and felt when he could feel himself losing his grip with reality every time when he would awake from those nightmares? It was as if with each new nightmare he was losing a piece of himself and then there was those moments that would come when he would break down into an anxiety attack just thinking about the Battle in New York because they always inevitably lead to him thinking of The Void and he would always find himself quickly grasping for breath as every cell within his body shook with terror.
The signs were subtle in the beginning. The first instance of something strange happening around him that Tony can vividly recall was when he was alone in the lab working with JARVIS. It was early late Sunday night at the beginning of July. Pepper asleep in their bed and Tony working on a new suit of armor. He thought he heard something and something within him told him to turn off the welder and the music and pay attention.
Tony's heart beat had picked up and goosebumps dotted up his arms as he tilted his head and closed his eyes trying to focus on his hearing. It seems silly to do but study after study had shone that blocking one sense can enhance the others and he needs to know if the sound he faintly heard is something from his nightmares and imagination or something real It came softly then like a little bell tinkling from far away and Tony felt something within him, a small electric jolt, answer the call.
Tony's eyes flashed open and he turned his head towards where he thought he heard the sound. It came again, a little more clearer, like it was traveling closer to him but it came from a completely different direction.
Spooked and feeling the goosebumps travel up his arms, Tony decides to ignore everything and went to turn the welder back on in a move to block out the sound when he sees a shadow of some sort out of the corner of his eye.
Tony quickly turned towards it but there's no one and nothing there.
Tony is alone, alone in his workshop with no one else around and it is silent. A chill runs up Tony's back at that realization. Tony debates on asking JARVIS if he had heard the sound, but decides once more to ignore it. Decides to ignore everything even something within him telling him someone is there with him, he just can't see them.
Considering how badly that Tony is handling things after New York, even fourteen months later, it's not out of the realm of possibility that everything that Tony feels happening is reminiscent to how things were after Afghanistan. Only amped up. Which is why Tony ignored the mysterious sounds and the shadow and believes them to just be another symptom of his PTS.
It started with the aftereffects of Afghanistan, the constant threat of torture and possible death from the terrorists and his own body. Then with Obie's betrayal leaving him there on the floor paralyzed unable to do anything to save himself. It's no wonder that Tony was left with emotional and mental scars. Scars that New York only deepened and festered the healing wounds.
The symptoms Tony had after Afghanistan and Obie's betrayal weren't as bad as what Tony has now, but back then he didn't see what he saw and felt in The Void. After the nightmares that continue to haunt him in the bright light of day, Tony isn't surprised how badly he's handling things. Even when he's awake things don't feel real as if he's still in the nightmare and he just doesn't realize it yet. Like the subconscious of his mind can't turn off the horrors of the nightmares and they are leaking into his waking conscious.
If it had just been that one night or even something that popped up once in a while then Tony could have continued to ignore it as just a minor auditory and visual hallucination and moved on with accepting his current and most devastating mental breakdown yet. Maybe even pushing him towards admitting how badly things really are.
Pepper told him that he was acting obsessively over creating new and more powerful Iron Man suits. Creating what Tony was calling his Iron Legion. That Tony was just using it as a coping mechanism so he could work himself to exhaustion and not have to deal with the emotional fallout of New York. Tony agreed, but only to himself because he couldn't acknowledge that he was as damaged as they thought he was. Or even worse than they could comprehend and each night he had those nightmares he felt himself slipping farther and farther from reality and sanity.
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Spirited Away