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HOPE	By : KerwinLS Category: X-men Comics > Slash - Male/Male Views: 1689 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the X-Men nor its characters. I make no money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-HOPE
- 2-LAST RESPECTS
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This story takes place during the events of X-Force #26

For Crow, whose story, not to mention her tireless work on the Logurt Fansite, showed me that despite Kurt’s death, there is still “So Much to Love”.

The man called Wolverine scared the shit out of me the first time I laid eyes on him, and it hasn’t gotten any better since then. But I knew I had to talk to him, even if he hated me for being the cause of Nightcrawler’s death.

I was still kneeling by Kurt’s side when Cyclops and Emma Frost got there. Cyclops knelt down beside me, checking Kurt for signs of life, but I knew it was useless. I’ve seen enough in my short lifetime to recognize death when I see it.

They asked me what happened. Choking back my tears, I told them.

By the time I had finished, the other team had returned. Cable was the first to reach me, putting a hand on my shoulder and drawing me up into his arms. The first thing I did was hide my face against his broad chest, but I didn’t stay that way for long. I knew whose reaction I had to see, who would take this the hardest of all.

I looked up just in time to see Logan push his mask up off his face as Psylocke asked, “Who?”

I could tell when he recognized the dead man by the distinctive noise his blades make when they extend, even before he said “Elf” in a calm, flat tone that I expected he would use if he were announcing the end of the world. I can still see the expression on his face as shock turned to devastation, and I knew his world had indeed ended.

Then his expression went from sorrow to teeth-clenching rage. He caught my eye for a moment, and slid his mask down over his face again, as if it would protect him from having his feelings exposed to view. A few of the other X-Men, mostly the older ones, surreptitiously cut their eyes sideways to watch him, wary of the Wolverine’s reaction. I figured they were the ones who knew the depth of his feelings for Kurt.

So intent on observing Logan was I that I never did notice who spoke next, other than that it was a woman’s voice that demanded, “Bring him back.”

I glanced down at the ground, screaming inside my head, “Don’t you think I would have done that by now if I could!?”

Instead of saying that, I fought for calm as Scott told the others I was not to blame, trying hard to keep my voice steady when I said wretchedly, “Me? Why would I be able -- How could – “

All of a sudden I couldn’t stand it anymore. Breaking free of Cable, I ran away, protesting that I couldn’t do that, couldn’t do anything, and wasn’t anybody. I heard Cable call out my name, and then he had caught up with me, stopping my headlong flight a short distance from the others. What he said was nothing I hadn’t already heard many times, that I had to live, no matter what

I wasn’t really paying attention, until Cyclops caught up to us, introducing himself as Cable’s father. By now, I was beyond surprise.

Cyclops had taken off his visor and wore his red glasses, so I could see his face for a change. Instead of the blame I expected from him, he said a few reassuring things to me and told Cable that we should both go to Sick Bay to be checked out. Then he went back to join the others.

Cable guided me gently towards the nearby buildings, angling away from where Kurt still lay. The group of people around his body began to disperse. Only Logan remained behind, as the sun sank slowly towards the ocean that surrounded the island.

This might be my only chance. I turned to Cable. “There’s something I have to do first. Something I have to tell Logan.”

“You don’t need to go anywhere near him, Hope. He’s a dangerous man, unpredictable and violent. I saw the way he looked at you after he realized who had been killed. He’s blaming you –“

I interrupted him, something I’d never dared do before. “I know all that. But I have to talk to him. Now.”

“I’ll come with you.”

“No. This is between him and me, no one else.”

That was one of the few times I saw uncertainty on the face of the man who had always been my mentor and protector. Finally, he gave a short nod as he made up his mind. “All right. But I’ll be right here watching. Stay on the other side of Nightcrawler’s body and don’t get within reach of those blades. If he so much as makes a move toward you –“

I didn’t let him finish. “I understand.”

Looking up at Cable’s ravaged face, I smiled slightly. “Thank you.”

He blinked and nodded again, then crossed his arms as he watched me walk away.

Tentatively, I approached the rigid tableau composed of Logan standing over his fallen comrade, while I kept Kurt’s body carefully between us. I said nothing, but I was sure he had noted my approach.

Finally, he glared up at me from the shadowed mask that was his face.

“Mr. Logan, I have something I need to tell you,” I began.

“Get out of here while you still can, little girl,” he said, his voice low and vicious. “There’s nothing you can say to me that I want to hear.”

“Yeah, there is.”

I could do this. I had to do this.

I swallowed hard and looked down at Kurt’s mangled body, seeking in my heart for the courage to continue.

Once again, I felt his strange three-fingered hand clutch convulsively at mine, felt the tears overflowing my eyes, and saw that hideous arm transfixing his body, with the blood seeping out all around it.

Kurt drew in a breath and his glowing eyes fixed on mine. I leaned closer to hear the words he struggled to say. “Worth it. I – I believe in you.”

He sucked in another rasping breath, grimacing at the pain. From the desperate look on his face, I knew there was something more he wanted to say. With much effort, he managed to get out another sentence just before that eerie light that always filled his eyes faded into darkness and his hand relaxed in mine. I knew those last words were meant only for one man’s ears and not for anyone else’s.

I looked up, meeting the rage on the Wolverine’s face with a determined expression of my own.

“Mr. Logan, with his last breath, Kurt said, ‘Tell Logan my love for him will never die’.”

The man’s blue eyes went wide. He raised his face and punched his claws upward above his head as if he wanted to skewer the setting sun, a howl rising from his lips such as I hope never to hear again in my life. Then he leaned down to Kurt’s body and grabbed Bastion’s arm. Bracing a foot against the dead man’s chest, he wrenched the arm free, tossing it away into the ocean accompanied by some of the foulest curses I would ever be likely to hear.

The fearsome Wolverine ripped his mask off and fell to the ground. The blades retracted as he reached to cradle Kurt against his chest, bowing his head and sobbing now with the raw and painful sound of a grown man who was not accustomed to crying.

My message delivered, I turned away, leaving him there alone to mourn for his lost lover.

Author’s Note:
When I finished HOPE, I thought I had finished writing about Kurt’s death. Then one day, I realized there was someone else who needed to be heard. See Chapter Two: Last Respects
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HOPE